Remember last year when I disappeared for a week and came back with a lot of really weird stuff to share with you? It happened again! The Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen (GISHWHES) was last week.
SO. MUCH. FUN. There were over 200 possible items to do this year, and I did 32 (and helped with a few more) for my team (Team Bangarang). I'm going to share with you the items that I did on my own or in collaboration with my teammates.
It's out of order, but I simply have to start with the AMAZING team photo my friend and teammate Tanja (she's a children's book author and illustrator, check her out) put together for us. This is the bunch of creative, fearless, strange, delightful people who made up team Bangarang this year.
#8 The year is 2021. Of all the unique and amazing human specimens on Earth, it was hard for the aliens to choose which ones to collect, but your team stood out as being excessively weird & worth "analysis". Your entire team was abducted and put into an alien specimen box. In grid form, show each member of your team along with a card explaining where they got you (city, country) and a word stating what special characteristic makes you unique.
And now on to my submissions for GISHWHES 2017.
#5 Nobody likes elevator music in an elevator - unless it’s flute or pan flute music played by a wood nymph. (We must see unsuspecting passengers in the elevator with the wood nymph.)
Nobody even batted an eye at this one!
#10 Pizza was invented in Italy in 997 AD to honor the Queen Consort, Queen Margherita. The next significant event in Italian history was the start of the Renaissance Period in the 14th century, which spawned a revival in art, architecture, science and learning. Let’s celebrate these two seminal moments in Italian history. Bake a Pizza decorated as a Renaissance painting that would make the Old Masters proud.
Since I built my own wood fired pizza oven, you know I had to do this challenge.
#23: This morning, my daughter, Maison reported having seen a “moon fairy” while I was sleeping last night. As you know, the rarely-seen moon fairies are mischievous, nocturnal creatures who participate in synchronized, representational flight. Using a long exposure and flashlights (or other movable light sources) photograph these elusive beasts.
My cousin Haley is a ROCKSTAR! Well, actually, she's a zookeeper in Australia and managed to get us this photo. I can't believe we pulled this one off!
#25 Wombat poop is shaped like little bricks. Sounds like the perfect building material for a tiny house! Show us! If we can figure out the architectural style you chose from your structure - bonus points! You’ll probably have to go to a local zoo to ask for collections of this building material. Enjoy your visit while you’re there. Your image must contain a caption that shares a little known fact about wombats.
Caption: "I believe the architectural style is what's known as early mid-century shit shack."
#26 (Create an old-school STOP MOTION film - up to 1 minute.) A Romeo and Juliet story... Two young virile socks (unmatched) meeting, falling in love, being kept apart and finally ending tragically.
#34 As this is likely the last year of gishwhes we should probably do something to memorialize it. A lot of folks have been saying, “Save gishwhes!” But we say, “Shave “gishwhes”... into the back of your head.” Try to match the amazing logo that Olivia Desianti formed way back when - which we still use today. Bonus points if you include the current or a former gishwhes hybrid mascot in your masterpiece. The same design shaved into a thick matt of back or chest hair would be an acceptable substitute.
#43: Never judge a book by its cover… or bread by its shape. Bake bread or cookies into the shape of something you would DEFINITELY not want to eat. (We hate to have to say this every year, but pornographic pastries will result in docked points.)
My girls know and love my cookies...but they won't eat these. ;-)
#64 Quilt a gishwhes onesie out of underwear and/or gloves. Strike a pose in the lobby of a financial institution or bank. Bonus points if it’s the floor of a stock exchange.
Don't worry, there's a LOT more silliness and doing good on the following pages. I just didn't want to kill your page load time with a TON of photos. Head to Page Two for more gishy fun.
My GISHWHES Submissions 2017 Page 2
I ran out back and did something for #65 quickly, when another teammate ran out of time for her better version.
You know SuperWhoLock? The amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and Sherlock? Well, that’s been done to death and everyone has moved on to the next big mashup. Let’s see 3D street art on a pavement or wall (in chalk!) that’s of a scene or setting from SuperWhoWatch (an amalgamation of Supernatural, Doctor Who and BayWatch)
#66 Personify a movie title.
#70 (Time-lapse down to 20 seconds.) Sidewalk cafes are all the rage, but most “sidewalk cafes” are total posers. Set up a “sidewalk cafe” the way it was meant to be - on an actual sidewalk. Cook a delicious omelet using just a magnifying glass, a hot sidewalk, and the sun. Share your feast with a friend!
We stick our tongues out at you, Misha. Our. Tongues. Out. At. You.
#77 Personify or embody your team name. Caption your image with your team name. - Shanon
#85 Let’s see LABSWHES. The Largest Awesome Balloon Sculpture the World Has Ever Seen. The themes this year are “insect” or “space”—or both. You must be in the middle of this structure.
Sorry to bug you, but it's the last GISHWHES. Could I borrow a cup of sugar and a Harlem Globetrotter?
I learned that if you go to an elementary school dressed as a chicken, it's pretty much the same as being a rock star. Same kind of adoration and attention from fans.
#90 “Why did the chicken cross the road?” There’s no better crossing guard than a mother hen! Dressed as a chicken, offer to help people cross a busy street.
#96 (Try to take a very close-up photo - a.k.a. “Macro” photo.) Nice grill! Combine the “tiny food” trend with urban fashion. Show someone cooking tiny hamburgers & hot dogs on a
friend’s “grill” (the dental kind.)
Huge thanks to my friend Ellie and her son for taking time out of their trip to London to do this for me!
#100 Calliope. Clio. Euterpe. Erato. Melpomene. Polyhymnia. Terpischore. Thalia. Urania. Inspirational goddesses of literature, the arts and science in Greek mythology. On the steps of the National Gallery in Trafalgar Square, provide a visual representation of the muse that guides you in your art and/or life.
#105 We know a little girl that makes a different kind of Advent Calendar. As she marks off each day on the calendar, she gives something away. Make your own version of a reverse Advent calendar. On the first day of gishwhes, create a decorated Advent calendar whereby, for each day on the calendar, you depict something you’re going to give away. Then, each day of the Hunt, take a picture of you fulfilling your calendar item. Submit 7 pictures in a grid (or a video slideshow) showing what you’ve done. Then, continue on through the calendar period. (Yes, this will continue after the Hunt is over, but though gishwhes as we know it may be ending, its spirit will live on in you!) -Keegan Connor Tracy’s 10-year old daughter
#106 The Lumbasumba region is being protected this year by Gishwhes. We gishers managed to purchase for permanent preservation more than 60 square miles of the Lumbasumba forest during the final weeks of registration in July! But the Lumbasumba area is more than just a forest. It’s also the hottest new dance craze. Show us how it’s done. (As all gishers know, you need to do it next to a REAL monkey, a parrot, or a camel to do it right.)
Ready for even more shenanigans? Head to the next page.
My GISHWHES 2017 Submissions Page 3
#112 A ballet troupe in tutus, engaged in a bar brawl - freeze framed at its most climactic moment. We pulled this one off 45 minutes before the hunt ended!
#115 Make A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of Le Grande Jatte by Seraut into an elaborate dot-to-dot image.
item #119, Trump l'oeil (not a typo).
FYI, Trompe l'oeil is a type of hyper-realistic painting, usually on walls, that means "to fool the eye." My caption: Nobody else can be a wall like I can. I am the best fake wall. All those other fake walls are losers. SAD!
#120 You’ve heard of a soap box derby, but the sofa bed derby is where it’s at. Let’s see two “race car” sofa beds, each with pajama-clad “drivers”, racing down an actual street. Be safe and complete this where there is absolutely no traffic!
#125: (Time-lapse under 20 seconds.) All good things must come to an end, and so it is with the Hunt. Create a “sand” mandala featuring images that symbolize the hunt to you… all using pixie sticks as your chakpur and sand. When it’s done, show us your masterwork and then, just like the Buddhist monks, sweep it away and get ready for what’s next.
#127 These Kung-Fu Nuns (dare we say “Nunjas?”) are biking through the Himalayas to stop human trafficking. (No, really.) In their honor, let’s see some tricks on a BMX bike. Rider must be dressed in a nun’s habit.
#139 Each member of your team must knit or crochet one piece of a quilted throw that, when combined, showcases your team emblem or symbol.
Way to pull it together, team! Also, I'm pretty sure that Misha doesn't actually know that quilting and knitting are not the same thing.
This one was my major fail! But I still love it.
#149 (Time-lapse up to 25 seconds.) Canada's Prime Minister Justin Trudeau gets a lot of attention for being super hot. Frankly, it's starting to detract from his ability to govern. Cool things down by making a sculpture of Trudeau out of Canada's most ample resource: ice. A couple of caveats: the frozen water you use must have something added to it to make it opaque, and inside the ice must be something emblematic of canada that doesn't melt (for example, a hockey skate). The timelapse must be of the sculpture melting revealing the object hidden inside. Make sure to frame your shot with a fitting or neutral background so that the final product really pops.
#140 Everyone talks about drum circles, but they grossly underestimate the power of other shapes. Create a complex shape with as many sides, angles or curves as you can, and demonstrate the power of percussion geometry - with as many drummers as you can drum up.
This is my teammate Kirsty's fabulous sculpture, I just photographed it.
#155 Over the years, we’ve had menstrual-hygiene supply sculptures of everything from dinosaurs to seagulls to puppies. We’ve also gotten a lot of flak for encouraging waste, and in protest gishers have donated thousands of menstrual pads to shelters, (which actually proves that in fact we at gishwhes can do no wrong). This final year’s list wouldn’t be complete without a menstrual-hygiene sculpture, so we’re ending this by splitting the difference: Create a tiny, perfectly sculpted statue of Michelangelo’s David or another famous historic sculpture of your choosing out of a SINGLE tampon, and then donate at least 1 box of menstrual hygiene supplies to your local shelter. Submit the image of your sculpture. The donation will be on the honor system. Remember, KARMA is a bitch.
And the last batch of my contribution photos is on the next page! I promise, there's good stuff there, too.
GISHWHES 2017 Scavenger Hunt Page 4
#156 Sure, Misha & HRH Queen Elizabeth II had a rocky year in 2016 with their “Brexit Breakup”, but despite a brief conscious uncoupling, theirs is a love that stands the test of time. Prove it by showing us Egyptian hieroglyphics, Greek urns, or other recently-unearthed archaeological finds that prove theirs is a love that has lasted through the ages. If you’re choosing to do a hieroglyphic, you may NOT permanently deface any stone - use chalk!
#163 My teammate Kirsty's aquarium hat! Again, her item and creation, I just took the photo.
This Huntâs must-have fashion trend: an aquarium hat with live fish. The aquarium hat must not endanger the live fish in any way.
#168 When the apocalypse comes and the power goes out you are going to be sorry you are so digitally-dependent! Have your social media page printed on microfiche… just in case.
My comment: Didja forget that microfiche readers use electricity, too? Didja?
#172 Now that this may be the last gishwhes-as-we-know-it ever, it’s time to reflect on missed opportunities. Let’s see the Item List Misha SHOULD have made all these years. Give us your team’s ideal gishwhes Item List with a minimum of 10 Items. If the majority of the items you create look like no thought was put into them (and you were just quickly writing down items to get the points), you will receive zero points.
#173 Complete one of the more challenging items on your team’s homemade gishwhes Item List. Item description: We all know that music soothes the savage beast, but did you know that alpacas can be particularly testy? Soothe a savage alpaca by performing live music for him or her. Just so you know, they particularly like harp music.
#175: Everyone knows “high noon” means “high tea”. Bring a little bit of civilization to the frontier with Wild West teacup and saucer holsters
USS Snacktastic, ready for takeoff!
#186 One of the biggest problems astronauts will face when they travel to Mars will be figuring out how to bring enough food for the three year journey. Porcupanda has offered the idea of making their spacecraft out of food. Show them how. Build an edible spacecraft using anything except “space ice cream” (Per our resident Director of Intergalactic Space Exploration, that stuff tastes like strawberry Styrofoam: “Bleecht!” as he so eloquently put it.)
#189 The World’s Worst Lawyer.
Kirsty Hahn's fabulous creation, I was just there to document and laugh.
#190 Oranges are the new black! Let’s see your most a-peeling cocktail dress all made out of - you guessed it - orange peels. Pose in a crowded urban bar.
#191 (Up to 30 seconds time-lapsed and/or edited.) You didn’t think we were going to let all those oranges go to waste, did you? Wall Drugs has signs announcing Wall Drugs locations hundreds of miles before you get to the store, so drivers get to anticipate the goodness coming. Place signs along 5 miles of road leading up to an orange juice stand that speaks hyperbolically of the life-changing rejuvenation of the coming refreshment with a countdown of the miles. You must have a sign at least every quarter of a mile along the path. If this is insurmountable to you, at the very least, host a freshly-squeezed orange juice party in your backyard for all of your neighbors. You won’t get points for that, but you’ll use the juice and make some friends.
This was my teammate Catherine's item, but my teammate Tanja and I (and our girls) helped out with this task. SO HOT. And I don't mean the boys.
Whew. They say GISHWHES (as we know it) is over forever, but I'm sure something wacky and weird and wonderful will evolve from it. So stay tuned--whatever it is, I'm going to be in the thick of it!